


Bad Habits

by goldenkc



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: College AU, F/F, F/M, First Meetings, M/M, Modern AU, Song fic, background Bellarke, background briller, background sea mechanic, badboy!jasper, delinquents dynamics, for the record i hate writing a mean murphy but i needed an instigator, jasper is an insecure sorta boyfriend, jonty centered, little angsty, little fluffy, past marper
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-19
Updated: 2018-04-19
Packaged: 2019-04-21 07:00:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14279529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldenkc/pseuds/goldenkc
Summary: jasper jordan is a bad habit monty green just can't let go of--based on bad habits by the federal empire





	Bad Habits

**Author's Note:**

> i'll be honest, i've only ever seen jonty as a platonic friendship, then i heard this song and a badboy!jasper + jonty college au was all i could think of. hope you like it :)

Being thrown into Jasper Jordan's life was surreal. Monty never saw himself falling for a guy who mixes coffee with red bull, sleeps two hours a day, and has tattoos up and down his arms. But lo and behold what fate has to offer.

To be perfectly candid, Monty always figured he'd end up with Miller. But nothing could make the engineering student forget his crush like _Jasper freaking Jordan._

They have the same friends--have for years--but never bumped into each other. It was Raven who suggested introducing the pair one evening at one of Clarke and Bellamy's famous BBQs. 

She brought him along and pointed out the tall and lanky college student before walking away, muttering something about how Monty may be the one to save Jasper's life, or rather, stop him from taking an impossible bet Jasper's pride just could not turn down. 

Clarke and Jasper have been in a ridiculous game of dare since they were toddlers. This week's dare: academic suicide.

“Come on!” Clarke rallies. “It's not even that bad.”

Bellamy mock-glares at his girlfriend. “You dared him to write his professor a signed love poem in the teacher eval. Kinda bad, princess,” he says with a playful tone. 

She sends him back a childish grin that makes him wonder how he ever fell in love with her. “Exactly, not that bad.”

“Compared to?” Raven asks, with a deadpan expression on her face with her arms crossed.

“That time he dared me to drink a bottle of Thousand Island dressing. I had to go to the emergency room,” Clarke replies dramatically, to which everyone groans, having heard this debate time and time again. 

The infamous Jasper walks across the patio just to add a snarky remark. Monty sees him up close and it’s like some voice in Monty's says _'that guy is going to fuck up your life, and you're going to love every second of it.'_

“I thought we told you to get over that one,” Jasper says, nonchalantly resting his arm on Monty's shoulder. “It was three years ago, and it’s not like you _died_.”

Clarke goes to retaliate, but Bellamy puts a hand on her bicep and says in what his friends call his 'dad voice', “Okay, enough. Jasper's not doing the dare.” Clarke and Jasper wink at each other inconspicuously, reminding Monty of a couple of children.

The crowd disperses a little, and Jasper finally looks down at the person to whom the shoulder he's leaning on belongs. Monty composes himself long enough for an introduction.

“Hey there. Bad news wrapped in clever pleasantries, at your service,” Jasper says smoothly, a toothpick at the corner of his mouth.

“Someone thinks highly of themselves,” Monty says sarcastically, honestly proud of his voice for not wavering.

Jasper winks at him, a heart-stopping action. “Part of my charm.” He looks at Monty up and down. “Where have I seen you before?”

“On campus. I got to Arkadia, too.”

“Ah okay,” Jasper nods, a devious smile on his face that makes Monty question whether to kiss him or run. “Now, are you one of Clarke's lame art friends or an actually interesting person?”

Jasper asked that question purposefully louder so the short-tempered blonde five feet away could hear and reply with a scoff and a glare despite the smile she was struggling to hold back.

“Neither, I'm guessing,” the short boy replies. “I'm Monty Green, engineering. What's your major?”

“Undecided. And I'm--”

“I know who you are. Raven got me to tag along because I need to save you, apparently.”

Jasper places a hand on his heart and says, “Well I didn't know I was some damsel that needed a cute Arkadian student to rescue me.” Monty chuckles at this, and Jasper is proud of himself for finally cracking the guy. 

“Who's the professor you're supposed to write a love poem to?” Monty asks, almost as if his confidence is rising just being around the guy who won't stop trying to make him smile.

“Dr. Griffin,” Jasper shrugs, tossing the toothpick in the nearest garbage bin and pulling out a cigarette.

Monty's jaw drops. “As in--”

“Clarke's mom? I know, right? A whole new kind of cruel. I mean, I go to their place for Thanksgiving so this year is going to be _awkward_ ,” Jasper says in a tone that sounds a little too serious.

“Wait, you're actually gonna write it? Bellamy said _signed_ love poem. You're gonna get suspended, or worse.”

Jasper laughs. “Okay, cool it, Hermione Granger.” 

Monty chuckles with him, and the two end up spending a while together. Hours pass and Monty finds himself having a good time, making a mental note to come to these BBQs more often. He’s always been friends with a few people here--Raven, Miller, Bryan, Clarke, Bellamy--but it’s Jasper who’s caught his attention.

Monty doesn’t usually like to hang around the center of attention, but something about Jasper Jordan has him not wanting to leave his side. Jasper is fun, the kind of carefree fun kids their age should be when they don’t feel the burden of schooling, parents, and expectations on their shoulders.

Without knowing it, Jasper feels the same about Monty. A studious nerd isn’t exactly the kind of crowd Jasper often associates himself with, but something about Monty Green has him hooked on wanting to find out more.

During the party, Monty turns down every offer for a cup of beer, which then has to follow with his speech about how he doesn’t drink. Sometimes Raven gives said speech.

Then by midnight, the party has pretty much ended. Friends are giving their goodbye hugs, promising to meet up again soon. Monty’s walking with Raven to her car when he spots Miller struggling to throw a drunken Jasper in a truck. 

Monty asks Raven if it would be alright if he goes with Jasper. “To make sure he gets home alright,” he reasons with a nonchalant shrug.

Raven chuckles, shaking her head. “Yeah, go for it, kid.” She watches Monty chase after Miller and knows she did the right thing bringing him along this time.

When Monty reaches Jasper’s truck, he offers, “I can drive him.”

Miller’s brows furrow. He looks between Monty and a stumbling Jasper, who he’s pretty sure is acting a little drunker than he really is. “You're sure?” he clarifies.

“Yeah, I didn't drink,” Monty promises. 

Miller chuckles, giving him the same look Raven just did. He nods anyway, getting Monty’s help to put Jasper in the passenger seat. He gives Monty a condensed explanation of how to get to Jasper’s apartment building, stating that it’s a rather large red building and that you can’t miss it.

“Thanks, man,” Miller says, clapping Monty on the back before waving him off.

Monty climbs in the driver’s seat, looking at Jasper who sits up a little straighter when he sees his driver. “You’re not Miller.”

“Spectacular observation,” he replies sarcastically, putting the truck in reverse. He’s not used to a vehicle like this, given that he owns a Prius, but he’ll adapt.

“Good,” Jasper says, letting out a small burp. “Miller's a buzz kill. Couple drinks and I'm not allowed to drive?”

Monty snickers at his garbled speech. “It's kind of the law.”

“Guess that's why he's at snitch school.” Monty laughs quietly, assuming he means the police academy.

Monty drives for a while; the potholes in the road are practically the only thing keeping Jasper awake. Then he remembers what he wanted to ask before they left.

“So… help me out ‘ere,” Jaspers slurs. Monty chuckles lightly, telling him to continue. “Do you like guys?” Monty glances over at him with furrowed brows, then back to the road. “‘Cause I know you dated Harper McIntyre in high school and into first year.”

“How’d you know I dated Harper? You two don’t really run in the same circles.”

Jasper gives a one-shouldered shrug and purses him lips in an almost comical way. “I asked Bellamy about you.”

“You did?” Monty asks with a flattered smile coming to his face.

Jasper nods. Then he says, “You didn’t answer the question.”

Monty pauses for a second, always awkward coming out to people, no matter how many times he does it. “Yes, I like guys. And girls.”

The drunken boy grins widely. “Cool. Like Clarke.” Monty nods at this. “I’m gay, ‘n case you were wondering.” Those are the last words Jaspers utters before he passes out, his face half smudged against the seat.

Eventually, Monty arrives at the building Miller told him is Jasper’s apartment. Problem is that Jasper’s flat is on the seventh floor and the elevator is down for maintenance. 

The short nap seems to have helped because Jasper isn’t too wasted anymore; enough so that he’s still a little wobbly walking up the steps, but not enough to warrant more than a helpful hand on his back, courtesy of the cute engineering student.

They reach his front door, and Jasper unlocks his door, saying with opened arms, “Welcome to my humble abode.”

It’s a small apartment, but seeming like it’s just the resident’s style. There’s a couch with a couple questionable stains, blanket lay across the back of it, no throw pillows in sight, and a giant TV suspended to the wall. In the kitchen to the left, it’s a little tight with an island and matching bar stools in the center. 

Jasper watches as Monty gazes around the space. Monty comes up to the hallway that leads to the bathroom and bedroom. Along the wall are about twenty framed pictures. There are some of Jasper with friends. Some of friends without Jasper. Some of a dog Monty’s never seen before. There’s Clarke, Bellamy, Raven, Miller, and a few people Monty recognizes as his Facebook friends he’s never met. But the thing Monty picks up on the most is that there is no family portrait of a six year old Jasper with a parent off each shoulder.

Monty is suddenly very aware of how close the other boy is to him. He looks up at him with a small smile. There’s only a little light down this hallway coming from the living room and the bedroom, but Monty can’t help appreciating Jasper’s appearance. He looks soft here and without a worry in the world, a calm light on him. 

Jasper leans in then, and rather than kissing like he desperately wants to, Monty cranes his neck backward. “Wait. Aren’t you still drunk?” he asks, a little worried about taking advantage.

“Not _too_ drunk,” Jasper says with a smirk, but Monty still has a nervous look on his face. Jasper takes a small step back, wondering if he’s crossed a line. “But sober enough to feel the sting of rejection.”

Monty scoffs with a smile. “Are you always this snarky?”

Jasper purses his lips, then nods cockily. “Most days. You always ask this many questions?”

He gives a one-shouldered shrug with a, “Usually.”

The taller boy takes a step closer, their chests a mere inch from each other, and he whispers lowly, “Then how about we both shut up and you let me throw you on the bed?”

Monty’s eyebrows rise, not completely objecting the proposition. “Confident,” he states.

Jasper winks back, “Always.”

* * *

Jasper wakes to the smell of pancakes, which, at first, is alarming. Then he remembers the night before--tangled limbs, sweat glistened bodies, Monty’s quiet moans. He smiles to himself as he walks toward the kitchen in his boxers. He grabs a t-shirt off the top of his dresser, tugging on the white material.

He can’t think of the last time someone made him breakfast. Maybe when he was younger and his mom was still sober. Maybe when Bellamy and Miller were sharing a place in first year and Jasper crashed there for a couple weeks. It doesn’t matter. The scent of pancakes is in the air and it’s intoxicating him more than the beers he had at the BBQ yesterday. 

“Well, well, way to make a guy feel special,” Jasper calls out in lieu of a hello. 

Monty turns around quickly, looking like he’s been caught. “I’m sorry. I hope you don’t mind. The only food you have are frozen pizzas, salad dressings, and what I think is a hamburger in a plastic container.”

“That’s still in there?” Monty lets out a chuckle like he thinks Jasper is joking, but the taller boy makes a mental note to throw out that container later.

Monty serves out the pancakes, putting a couple on the plate in front of Jasper. Then he puts a couple on his own plate and sits beside him. He’s awkward, unknowing of what kind of small talk you can discuss the morning after you’ve seen the person naked.

“So,” he begins, “Are you still gonna write that poem?”

Jasper gasps dramatically. “Did you sleep with me in exchange for not writing it? I knew Raven was a schemer, but to pimp out a friend? Tsk, tsk.” Monty chuckles and shoves Jasper's thin arm. “I can't back down from it, though. Besides, Doc Griffin and I are on good terms. She's not the hard-ass she pretends to be. She'll laugh when I tell her that her daughter set me up.”

Monty hums in response with a mouth full of pancake. Jasper looks over at him and chuckles, a soft look on his face. Jasper thinks he really likes this guy he met less than 24 hours ago--which is quite rare for him and almost troubling.

They talk for a little while. Suddenly, it’s 10AM and Monty’s saying that he should get going soon. Jasper offers to let him stay longer if he wants, but Monty says he has to respectfully decline, which makes Jasper laugh and call him a dork with a dork language.

Monty chuckles anyway as slips his phone into his pocket and puts on his sneakers. Jasper stands near the door, appearing more confident than he really is when he asks, “Can I see you again?”

“Really?” Monty questions, not expecting that. Jasper came off as the one-night-stand type, which he completely is, and Monty _would_ be fine with that if he didn’t almost (totally) fall in love after last night.

“Yeah. You’re pretty cool, Green,” he says, poking Monty on the nose, which earns what almost sounds like a giggle.

Monty can feel himself blushing so he quickly says, “Yeah, yes, I’d like that. Give me your phone.”

Jasper does as he’s told and Monty programs in his phone number. Monty decides against what he believes to be his better judgement and kisses Jasper’s cheek in goodbye. This, of course, shocks Jasper a little. 

Never has a guy kissed his cheek goodbye. He can’t tell if he likes it. But he doesn’t get to say anything else because Monty is already down the hallway, and Jasper is already wishing he was back.

* * *

**To Monty  
** **From Jasper**  
come over ;)  
**Sent at 10:33PM**

 **To Jasper  
** **From Monty**  
Is this a booty call?  
**Sent at 10:34PM**

 **To Monty  
** **From Jasper**  
maybe… is that ok?  
**Sent at 10:34PM**

 **To Jasper  
** **From Monty**  
Haha yeah that’s okay. I’ll be there in fifteen :)  
**Sent at 10:35PM**

Monty is right on time, knocking on the wooden door at 10:50PM. Jasper opens it and tugs him in by the wrist, their lips meeting in the middle.

The shorter boy hums through the kiss. “Couldn’t get enough of me, huh?” he asks, given that’s it’s been just over a week since their first encounter. 

“Guess not,” he replies with a smile, kissing him again. Jasper walks backward, pulling Monty with him to the bedroom.

Articles of clothing fall to the floor pretty quickly. Monty is under Jasper on the bed, a position he’s found to enjoy quite a lot. He lets out a breath, which comes out as a moan, and something that vaguely sounds like, “ _Jaz_.”

Jasper pulls back a second, an amused expression crosses his face. “Did you just call me Jaz?”

Monty feels as though he’s malfunctioned for a second. “Um, y--yeah?” he stutters out in what essentially sounds like a question. “Is that okay?”

The boy on top nods softy, smiling the kind of smile that seems to be very rare. “Yeah, that’s okay. No one’s ever called me that. Kind of cute when you do,” he says before nibbling on the same spot that made Monty utter his name in the first place.

“Noted. I’ll be sure to say it more often,” Monty says back lowly, stuttering out the words between even more moans because Jasper sure knows how to unravel him.

The next morning is one of Jasper’s favourite mornings for as long as he can remember. 

The pair sit on the balcony, passing a tub of ice cream back and forth, eating it with a fork because Jasper hasn’t done dishes in a while.

It’s just after 5AM and the sun is rising. The city is as quiet as it’ll ever be. Jasper never sits out here for the hell of it, never took the time to appreciate the beauty.

“For all its faults, Earth is really beautiful,” Jasper says quietly, shoving another forkful of rocky road in his mouth.

“Did you grow up here?” Monty asks, testing the limits of how many personal details you’re allowed to know about your booty call.

Jasper shakes his head. “Just outside of the city, in a tiny little house. Moved here three years ago when I started at Arkadia.” Monty stays silent as Jasper takes another bite of ice cream. “What about you?”

“I’ve always lived here. Parents practically planned out my whole life.”

Jasper hums, still looking at the sun. “I had to plan everything out for myself. Didn’t do a good job, but it’s not like I had stellar role models or anything… I never knew my dad. Mom got into the heavy shit so she was always there, but never _there_ , y’know?”

Monty nods, taking the ice cream when it’s offered back. “I’m proud of you.”

Jasper finally faces him, a quizzical look on his face. “How so?”

He shrugs in response. “You got out of there. Made your own path. Didn’t follow in your parents’ footsteps. That’s all I’ve known since I could walk. I went to school where they wanted, took the classes they wanted, dated the girl they wanted.”

“Bellamy told me you really liked Harper,” Jasper says a little quieter, almost insecure.

Monty nods. “I did, yeah. She was my first girlfriend,” he says with a nostalgic chuckle. “She’s one of my best friends now, though. I love her.”

“That’s nice,” he says sincerely. “Having someone like that.”

“Hey,” Monty says, kicking Jasper’s knee. “You’ve got people. Miller, Raven, Clarke, Bellamy--they’d do anything for you.”

“I’ve got you, too, right?”

Monty smiles, feeling happy with himself for being important enough in Jasper’s life. “Yeah, you do.”

Jasper gets on his knees, crawling forward to kiss Monty. It’s different than their other kisses. It’s not hungry, desperate, or heated. It’s soft, tender, as if he’s speaking emotions through the movement of his lips.

When Jasper pulls away, he doesn’t look at Monty again, he keeps his eyes on the horizon. Monty can tell what a vulnerable state Jasper is in right now, and he’s thankful to be the one to see it, because he has a feeling it’s not shown often.

While Jasper is staring out at the sunrise, Monty can’t help looking at /him/. He’s sad, but still beautiful. He has no worry lines in his forehead, his shoulders are relaxed, he’s at ease around Monty, and Monty can’t help feeling a little proud at that.

* * *

They’ve been doing whatever it is they’re doing for over a couple months now. The days pass with heated kisses, throaty moans, and tangled limbs in Jasper’s bed. Monty feels good with him, comfortable.

Monty’s home life is a little complicated. His dad is quiet and there aren’t many instances Monty can remember turning to him for help. His dad is almost always working in the office or the garden, not giving Monty much opportunity for bonding moments.

His mother, Hannah Green, is a difficult woman. She’s very supportive of her son--to an extent. As long as Monty follows along the path his mother’s perfectly laid out for him, he’s got her approval. But things have been a little rocky since Monty came out two years ago after his breakup with Harper. 

He’s always been the perfect son; perfect grades, getting in no trouble, no drugs, and a bonus was that his parents adored Harper. The ex-couple stayed friends, and Monty always had the feeling his mother was rooting for them to get back together.

Today, he’s packed his bag with a change of clothes, ready to go to Jasper’s for the night. He has a lot of freedom in his house, and his mother rarely asked where he was going. He was not so lucky this evening.

Hannah’s chopping vegetables for a stir fry when Monty walks in the kitchen for a bottle of water. She asks if he’s staying for supper and he replies that he’s going out.

“Where have you been lately?” she inquires.

“Just busy,” he dismisses smoothly, putting the bottle in his backpack.

“Do you have a new girlfriend or something?” she asks, putting a little too much emphasis on the word _girlfriend_ to be subtle. She’d made it clear before that she wasn’t okay with Monty’s ‘lifestyle choice’. 

Monty stops, dropping his bag on one of the bar stools and crossing his arms. “Why can’t you just ask if I’m dating _someone_? Why do you have to gender it?”

Hannah sighs, continuing chopping the pepper. “I suppose you’re seeing a boy then?” she says tensely, squaring her shoulders.

“Not that it’s any of your business, but yes, I am.” He puts his arms through the straps of his backpack and grabs his car keys by the front door. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go see him.”

He drives a few clicks above the speed limit, trying to cool off before he arrives at Jasper’s. He gets to the big red building and takes the steps two at a time.

As soon as Jasper opens his front door following a few quick knocks, Monty throws his arms around him, pulling him in for a rough kiss. Breathily, he asks, “You busy?”

“Absolutely not,” he replies with a chuckle. But he’s never seen Monty this upset before, and he doesn’t like it. “What’s wrong?”

“Make me forget about it,” he whispers back huskily. He looks up at Jasper with pleading eyes, begging, just for the night.

Jasper nods. “Happily,” he agrees, allowing himself to be pulled by the shirt collar to his bedroom. 

Jasper doesn’t know how he feels about being a kind of safe haven for Monty. Of course he loves that he’s the first person Monty wants to go to, but it feels like this whole… relationship is in high speed, and he’s getting motion sickness. 

He’s never been in a real relationship before, and though they haven’t talked about it yet, that’s what this is starting to feel like.

* * *

Jasper sits around Murphy’s poker table for their weekly game. There are solo cups of beer at each person’s elbow, a pile of chips in the middle of the table, and pretzels thrown about the room (mostly aimed at Bellamy’s head whenever he tries to ‘dad’ the group).

There’s also the faint smell of cigarette smoke in the air, hence the reason Clarke never joins. Sometimes Miller’s boyfriend Bryan will have a seat, but not very often because he almost always loses as quickly as Bellamy. Today, there’s Miller, Murphy, Bellamy, Raven, Raven’s girlfriend Luna (who is surprisingly very good at this game), and Jasper.

Raven is always in charge of the playlists because she has the best taste in music. Her most recent mix is playing in the background while the friends converse over poker and other things.

“So how are you and Green doing?” Murphy asks, tossing 20 dollars’ worth of chips in the pot.

Jasper chuckles, “Don’t try distracting me here, buddy. I’m still gonna kick your ass.”

“Then answer the question,” he shrugs with that sly smirk of his.

Jasper licks his lips, raising $30, then he looks at Murphy from across the table. “Monty and I are good. It’s fun,” he says, hoping that’ll be enough to get him to stop prodding.

“So fun that you aren’t even Facebook official?” Murphy asks, seeming like he knows something the other doesn’t, and it’s ticking Jasper off.

“I think Murphy’s _jealous_ ,” Raven sings, practically beaming.

“Of Monty? _Murphy_ ,” Jasper says, putting his hand on his chest. “Why didn’t you tell me you felt this way?” he jokes, causing everyone at the table to laugh.

Murphy grumbles, folding his cards, “Fuck you, Jordan.”

Bellamy gets everyone to calm down, stating he doesn’t want to keep losing because they’re all distracting him; which earns a comment from Luna--something along the lines of, “Yeah, _that’s_ why you always lose.”

Murphy stands, walking to the kitchen to grab a beer. Jasper goes to follow him.

“What were you getting at?” Jasper accuses, standing in the doorway so Murphy can’t walk away.

Murphy shrugs in a cocky way that makes Jasper want to deck him. “I remember what Monty was like with Harper. He just doesn’t seem like the friends with benefits type, and you certainly aren’t the relationship type. You sure he’s really happy with you?” he asks accusingly, narrowing his eyes a moment, a smirk still on his face.

Jasper doesn’t give a response; he just clenches his jaw, physically restraining himself. Murphy gives a scoff, satisfied with the non-verbal reaction, bumping his shoulder into Jasper’s roughly as he walks out the kitchen.

Monty’s never expressed any dislike in the way their relationship works before, but that doesn’t mean he’s exactly okay with it. Maybe he wants something more. Maybe he wants to be able to call Jasper a boyfriend. Maybe Murphy’s just gotten in Jasper’s head and it’s causing this unnecessary meltdown.

But it gets him thinking, _is_ Monty happy?

He shakes his head as though to rid himself of the thoughts, then he returns to the table after grabbing another beer. He plays like he’s fine, but his luck runs out quickly and he loses the hundred dollars he walked in with. Jasper ignores Murphy’s cackling in the background as he scoops up the pot.

Jasper gets up and says goodbye to his friends, saying that it’s been a long day and he should be getting home soon. When he does get home, it’s in a bitter mood, not wanting to let Murphy’s words get to him. He fishes his phone from his pocket and texts quicker than his brain can keep up.

 **To Monty  
** **From Jasper**  
u busy?  
**Sent at 10:47PM**

 **To Jasper  
** **From Monty**  
Nope. What’s up?  
**Sent at 10:48PM**

 **To Monty  
** **From Jasper**  
come over?  
**Sent at 10:48PM**

 **To Jasper  
** **From Monty**  
On my way :)  
**Sent at 10:49PM**

Jasper lets out a relieved sigh. Then he comes to the realization that this is exactly what Murphy meant--Monty isn’t the friends with benefits type, but he does it for Jasper.

Jasper is so thankful for his… whatever he is to him. But he thinks deep down that he doesn’t deserve Monty, and that’s a terrifying thought.

There’s three knocks at his door thirteen minutes after the last text was sent. Monty barely has time to drop his backpack by the door before Jasper’s lips are searching for his. 

Monty chuckles lightly into the kiss, kicking off his sneakers. “Nice to see you, too.” He pulls back a second to say hi when he sees a somewhat desperate look in Jasper’s eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“Seems like it’s your turn to make me forget about it,” he says, almost phrasing it as a question and hoping Monty’s okay with it.

“Happily,” he replies, echoing what Jasper told him the last time, intertwining his fingers in Jasper’s and letting him pull him to the bedroom.

* * *

Monty wakes in the following morning to find Jasper not in bed. He sits up, slowly stretching his arms in the air. He lets out a soft sigh, finding his boxers and t-shirt somewhere on the floor. He ventures out into the living room of the apartment he’s been in many times the last few months. 

He soon finds that Jasper isn’t even in the flat. Monty does, however, see a note left on the kitchen island. 

**went for breakfast, back soon. –J**

Monty smiles to himself, pocketing the paper. He walks over to the front door where he dropped his backpack the night before. He grabs out his history binder, deciding to get some studying done.

It’s another fifteen minutes before Jasper returns home. He hands Monty the coffee and breakfast sandwich without looking at him, which comes off a bit odd, but Monty chalks it up to a long line at the café that made him cranky.

They spend the day together--or rather, they sit in the same room, not talking. Monty’s realized today that Jasper seems on edge. They’re at the tiny dining room table, studying for separate midterms.

“What am I to you?” Jasper asks abruptly.

The question catches Monty off guard. He shifts awkwardly, putting his hands in his lap and twirling his thumbs. “Um, we haven’t talked about that yet.”

“I know,” Jasper says too quickly, like he’s upset about something. 

Monty’s only known him for a few months, but he knows every inch of the Jordan boy’s body, and though he may not know all the dark thoughts flowing through his brain, Monty likes to think he’s got a pretty good idea of the way Jasper thinks.

“What are you looking for?” Jasper asks.

Monty begins to walk on eggshells. “I don’t know. Dating, friends with benefits, boyfriends--I’m not sure.”

Jasper slouches further into his chair, playing with a pen. “You come here whenever home gets too much for you. I mean, am I just a way to piss of your parents, some kind of distraction? Or is there something real here?”

“Where the hell is this coming from?”

“I’ve never had a real relationship, Monty. This shit doesn’t come easy to me. So if I _am_ just a vice, let me know.” 

Monty is practically stunned into silence, not knowing how to comfort him. He doesn’t want to say the wrong thing, but he feels like almost everything is wrong.

“It’s not like there’s a real future,” Jasper mutters, quietly, but just loud enough for other boy to hear.

Monty’s almost offended. “Says who?”

Jasper chuckles bitterly, standing up. “How naïve are you?”

“Excuse me?” 

“Why are you fooling yourself here?” he snaps with elevated volume. “I'm a mess, Monty. I smoke and drink too much, and I probably have a mild gambling addiction,” he says it like a joke, but there's a hint of truth that strikes a chord in Monty. “You're top of your class, a genius in things most people can't even _dream_ of, and you're gonna win the next Nobel Prize or something.”

Monty wishes Jasper wouldn't speak and think so lowly of himself, but with demons like his, it’s understandable.

“People like _me_ hold back people like _you_ ,” he continues quieter, almost saddened. He slumps his shoulders inward uncharacteristically, refusing to look Monty in the eyes. “I'm just a phase for you. A bad habit you'll fall out of eventually.”

Monty steps forward, placing his hands on Jasper's cheeks. “Maybe you're a habit I'm not risking letting go of.”

“And why would you do that?” Jasper asks in such a vulnerable tone, it pains Monty.

“Because,” he responds confidently, “You, _this_ , is worth it. You’re worth _everything_. So don’t talk down on yourself just because you’re scared.” Jasper goes to deny it, but Monty beats him to it. “I know you. You’re scared people won’t accept you so you lash you when they get too close. Well I’m not letting you get away that easy.”

Jasper’s got insecurities Monty can’t think of, but he’s willing to if only Jasper lets him in. The shorter boy whispers assurances, telling him that he’s never letting go over something stupid. 

“That’s what all this is over, right? You’re worried this isn’t real?” Jasper nods solemnly. Monty leans forward to kiss him, slowly and deeply. “I promise you, it is real, and you are the best thing for me.”

Jasper sniffs, looking down. “I’m sorry.” Monty shakes his head at the unneeded apology, stroking his thumb against the taller boy’s cheek.

Jasper gives him a small smile, one that makes Monty’s heart skip like the day they first met. Monty shrugs with one shoulder, a sincere look on his face, then he says, “We've all got our bad habits.”

And Jasper is one Monty's willing to hold onto.

* * *

Monty ends up staying that night, too. It’s four in the morning and Jasper’s asleep in bed next to him. This was the first night they didn’t fuck first; they just went to sleep after a kiss goodnight. Jasper said it was a tad too domestic for him, but the laugh Monty gave out after the comment made it all worth it.

The moonlight is peaking through the curtains. The light is hitting Jasper just right, and it has Monty in awe. Then Jasper takes in a deep breath and Monty’s sure not to move, hoping he doesn’t wake him.

“Creeper,” Jasper mutters before his eyes even open.

Monty scoffs, not believing what he’s hearing. “How the hell did you know I was looking at you?”

Jasper gives him that tired grin of his and it sends Monty’s heart soaring. “I know what your breathing sound like when you’re sleeping.”

“Who’s the creeper now?” Monty retorts. He keeps looking at him, which makes Jasper’s brows furrow and ask in a mumbling voice why he’s staring. “You’re really beautiful.”

Jasper makes a face that opposes that statement, with a matching ridiculous laugh. “What are you on? You know what pot does to genius brains,” he says, poking Monty’s forehead. 

Monty turns from on his back to on his side to fully face Jasper. Then he leans forward and kisses him. Jasper asks what that was for. Monty traces his fingers down his boyfriend’s forearms, following the patterns of the tattoos. “Just to remind you that I like you.”

“Thanks,” Jasper says sincerely. “I like you, too, bud.”

It’s Monty turn to laugh ridiculously. “ _Bud_? Wow, way to ruin a moment. It’s a mystery why I tolerate you at all.”

Jasper smiles widely, “Sure is.” 

Then he leans in to kiss him again, finding himself hovering over Monty’s slim figure and planting kisses down his jawline and neck. When he pulls back, he pushes the hair on Monty’s temple that blocks the light from hitting their faces.

“Seriously though… I’m glad we talked. I do like you, a lot. And it kind of scares me,” Jasper admits, and Monty knows what a challenge that must have been.

Monty rests his forehead against Jasper’s and says, “I’m glad, too. You really are good for me, Jaz.”

Jasper gets off from atop Monty to lay back beside him. It’s seeming like they’re going to go back to sleep, but Jasper just has to spoil the quiet.

“Hey, when we get married, whose name are we taking?” Monty fills the room with laughter, and Jasper struggles to hold a straight face. “It’s a serious question, Monty! Is that not the next step? I’ve never been in a relationship before.”

The chuckles die down and they face each other again. “It’s okay,” Monty says as he runs his fingers through Jasper’s hair. “We can learn together.”

Jasper smiles back softly. “I’d like that.”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks so much for reading, don't forget to hit that kudos if you liked it :)


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